Monday, August 07, 2006
Step 1: Listen to Song, Step 2: Have Sex
I love how news is prioritized these days. With the exception of the Heeeeeeeezbolah vs. Israel steel cage match, the world must be asleep today because the headline on almost every news site reads 'Study: Sexy music leads to teen sex' or something along those lines. First of all, that is a great headline. It pulled me right in. Second, what is sexy music? And why are teens doing the Winnie Cooper/Kevin Arnold no pants dance because of it?
The answer to the first question is complex. Sexy music has evolved over the years. Gone are the days when parents used to cover their kids eyes as Elvis was swinging his hips to Heartbreak Hotel (1. because he got super fat and 2. because he's dead). That was the NC-17 moment of the 50's and early 60's. Or when Michael Bolton cheesily sang "When a Man Loves a Woman." That too was pretty sexy.
Nowadays, I think sexy music could be classified as any song:
1. that refers to a woman's backside as a "booty," "ass," or my personal favorite "donkey."
2. that uses the above terms in the sentence "back that ___ up."
3. where a guy and a girl are going back and forth talking about unbuttoning their clothes.
4. where a female singer talks about a guy who she wants to have a baby with- that practically screams sex.
5. that includes references that I simply don't understand and have to ask someone to explain. For example, "london bridge" or "milkshakes."
Why would these songs have an impact on teens? As the article points out there are lot of other factors that could be taken into consideration for why teens are having sex. But here's my theory: teenagers, for the most part are pretty stupid. And they are horny. Stupid and horny = sex. Enough said. By the way, this is my second Michael Bolton reference today.
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I always thought it was the unsupervised free time and the raging hormones.
I would have never guessed that the Ying Yang Twins were the culprits.
I would have never guessed that the Ying Yang Twins were the culprits.
The Michael Bolton ditty that gets my blood racing is definitely "How Can We Be Lovers." The guy knows his shit.
Great tune. What about "How am I supposed to Live Without You." It was playing when Zach and Kelly broke up at the prom. That Jeff from the Max was no good. Stealing Kelly like that.
i saw someone with this hair last night...and SHE was definitely NOT the sexy sonafabitch that MB is...
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: Wednesday, August 09, 2006
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