Monday, July 23, 2007

 

Hey babe, whats your sign?


This is something I probably shouldn't admit to but I feel like everyone who reads what the f has the right to know about it. It is so shocking it is going to blow your little minds. The fact is, I lack game. Thats right, game. I don't know what it is but I just don't have it when I talk to the lady folks. Maybe its because I dont have any good opening lines or perhaps its because I don't have very good conversational skills. Maybe its because I like to smell womens hair and tell them it would make for a great doll. Who knows? I guess after God gave me the good looks and adonis like physique he felt no man could be so perfect and gave me this weakness. Nah, that can't be it because the first two traits were lies. ALL LIES!

So what is it? You people have hung out with me at the bars, what do I do wrong? Aside from the obvious stuff like my face, hygiene, non matching clothes, not having a surfer body, and shoving large amounts of food in my face at one time, there has to be something that can be fixed. Well, I dont know what it is. Maybe I should just roll on top of women and start making out with them. Actually, that sounds like a good opener. Maybe to seal the deal I'll quote the Simpsons for an hour. Perfect.

If someone has any advice they would like to throw my way feel free. If its good enough I'll let you watch me try and throw game with it.

Comments:
stop thinking of it as game and just be yourself.

ok, now that i have said the obligatory "right thing" let me tell you this.

play a little hard to get. be a little jerky towards the next girl you see at a bar and let her ask the questions.

crack a joke or two, but it cannot include anything sexual (humans or animals) or anything related to bodily functions.
 
Definitely don't be a little bit of a jerk, unless you want to pick up a girl who will play games.

Jerky guys at bars + me =me walking away and laughing at them.

Asking if her tits are real and burping after each sip of beer is also an attractive quality
 
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